Bestie: I probably left them in the dressing room and someone got them or who knows. It's okay, only plastic...$200 plastic, but plastic none the less.
DJ: I know! I'm so pissed for you! Say a prayer and maybe they will turn up.
Bestie: I know! I've been praying to St. Anthony. He and I are pretty tight. We go way back. I need his direct line.
DJ: Always losing stuff are we?
Bestie: Um...like I really don't get how irresponsible I am when it comes to electronics and accessories. I think children are out of the question at this point.
DJ: Well, unlike electronics and accessories, children can scream so that you can locate them.
Bestie: That's true! People are always willing to return children.
DJ: Because sunglasses and phones don't pick their boogers or shit their pants.
Bestie: Exactly. The sad thing is I like my sunglasses more than children.
(A FEW DAYS LATER)
DJ: FML! I just knocked my side view mirror off.
Bestie: It's ok. Remember, it's just plastic. Your mirror is in expensive plastic heaven with my sunglasses.
(A MONTH LATER)
DJ found the sunglasses under her bed while discovering the dust bunnies she had been neglecting.
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